Corporate Hippy

Cedar Point has a new ride for 2005 … which swings riders back and forth in a seemingly out-of-control pendulum motion while rotating counter-clockwise; at the peak of the pendulum movement that reaches a maximum speed of 70 mph, riders are upside down 140 feet high above the ground.

I was at Cedar Point a couple of weekends ago and I chose not to ride this ride. I didn’t really feel the need to wait in line for 1+ hours to physically feel what I’ve been mentally feeling since early August.

Recently, my friends have been wondering if they should contact my local police and file a missing person’s report because I’ve just not been hitting my regular social scene (which basically means I’ve not been super responsive to emails, and especially unresponsive to voicemails). I’ve been jumping from one thing to the next, leaving me feeling like my head was swinging “back and forth in a seemingly out-of-control pendulum motion while rotating counter-clockwise”

It started with Ore to Shore in early August – a long weekend in the UP with Jess and Mom. Followed shortly (VERY SHORTLY) thereafter by our fantastic Oregon trip – 11 days of travel, including a whirlwind camping, biking and touristing adventure. In my first week of returning from my Oregon bliss, while contimplating and planning our ‘off-the-grid’ fugure, I found myself once again interviewing for a job that I thought was long since lost. Meanwhile, financial problems (due to complete lack of attention to bill collectors, and not so much from lack of funds) created severe stress. Toss in a blown engine in the Jeep (enter serious price tag on getting that fixed), sending the oldest off to college (paying for housing & amenities, and dealing with the ex-wife in the process), and not yet being able to pay for my fantastic new bike (and therefore, having to leave it at the bike shop after every ride) for spice.

Now, all of this alone is alot to process, in my opinion. But then I was offered the new job. So, I’ve got all this other stuff going on in my (already fragile to the point of medication) mental world and now I have to figure out how to leave Harman after 5 years and start something new and scary. I have to say, that overall, I think I’ve dealt with it all quite well. I mean, I won’t deny a blow up here and there, but seriously .. I came out better than I definitely could have ..

I think the ride is finally over. I’ve unbuckled the silly seatbelt and have started to exit the structure. I’m still a little weak in the knees, wobbly and dizzy, but I’m starting to get my bearings now. And with that, I want to say thanks to my pal and soulmate that I married for being so patient, supportive and helpful. Thanks to the rest of my best pals for waiting on the sidelines for me to return to society. The occasional ‘you still alive’ ping was much appreciated and knowing that you’d all still be there whenever I surfaced is touching and makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

life hippy

As ‘hippie’ as I try to be, recycling is someplace I continually fall short. I admit, right here, right now, I throw away returnable bottles, use paper plates more than washable ones, and toss magazines and newspapers in the same plastic garbage bag as everything else.

I’ve been thinking lately, that I should make an effort. I just haven’t actually made the first step. This article below was in our company newsletter (i added the image for effect) …

If you believe that life just won’t be the same without a hard copy of this week’s fascinating factoids about paper recycling, think about this:

Every year more than 900 million trees are cut down to provide raw materials for American paper and pulp mills.
Americans use more than 67 million tons of paper annually, which is about 580 pounds per person.
Every Sunday, Americans throw away 90 percent of recyclable newspapers, which wastes half a million trees.
Every day U.S. businesses generate enough paper to circle the earth 20 times.
Paper products make up the largest part —approximately 40 percent — of our trash.
There is good news, however (and it has nothing to do with saving money on your car insurance):

A single tree can filter up to 60 pounds of pollutants from the air each year. Recycling just one ton of paper saves 17 trees (not to mention 380 gallons of oil, three cubic yards of landfill space, 4,000 kilowatts of energy and 7,000 gallons of water).
Making recycled paper uses 64 percent less energy and 58 percent less water than making new paper.
In 1990 we recycled 28 percent of the paper produced in the U.S.; by 2000, that number had increased to more than 45 percent.
Visit the Michigan Recycling Coalition or the Environmental Protection Agency web sites for more information on what you can do to help America’s recycling effort.

Like, groove on this, man

its mornings like today when i find myself longing for the days when i don’t have to rely on a certain sized paycheck to pay my bills … driving to work on days like today helps to solidify my plan to check out of this crazy society and become better friends with mother nature and personal relaxation ..

yesterday morning, i left the house at 6:40 am … i pulled in to the office parking lot at 7:30 am (for the mathmatically challenged, that’s a 50 minute drive) .. today, i had a little trouble getting out of bed and therefore left the house a mere 10 minutes later and i didn’t make it to the parking lot until 8am (for those of you following along at home, that would make today’s drive 70 minutes). One hour and ten minutes to move only 38 miles.

i ride a mountain bike in the woods for many reasons, not the least of which is because it helps me deal with suburban life by allowing me to romp in nature on a regular basis. mountain biking is supposed to release me from the chaos of consumerism and allow me zen relaxation. while this is true for the duration of the ride itself, the events leading up to, and follwing the ride often leave much to be desired.

here’s the scenario …
i wake up very very early in the morning to try and beat traffic and hit the office early. theoretically, if i make it to the office early enough, i can leave the office earlier in the afternoon to beat traffic on my way home. so, i get home, and start rushing around to grab all of my gear and get it into the truck (shorts, jersey, sports bra, socks, shoes, gloves, helmet, bike, hydration – plus, the extras for fall/cooler weather – arm warmers, leg warmers/tights, vest/jacket, helmet light and battery .. and don’t forget warm dry clothes to throw on after the ride)…

if i’m lucky, i have all of this stuff clean and handy .. more often than not tho, its scattered about the house from the ride before.

after running around the house like a crazy person for awhile, its back in the truck to fight traffic for another ridiculously long period of time, because now its rush hour … finally, we reach our destination and run around some more getting ready and situated for the ride — hoping that you’ve remembered all the parts and pieces, and that you’re light is charged and working.

then we ride, which is generally fabulous, fun, relaxing, social, and exhilirating.

when the ride is over, there’s often a good amount of socialization, sometimes we go for food and drink, sometimes, we just head home … either way, its generally well after 8pm, sometimes closer to 9 .. going out with the group is a fun and easy answer to dinner .. bringing us home just in time to go to bed, because, you know .. i have to get up super early the next day to get to work ..

often, we head home ourselves and are left to figure out what to do for dinner. generally, there’s enough food at home that i could cook something up. but, its late and dark, and most likely, there’s so many dirty dishes that i’d have to wash a bunch just to cook with and eat on. so, we drive through some fast-food restaurant and buy something full of processed chemicals and preservatives, not to mention fat and cholesterol. we take it home, sit on the couch and watch some silly TV while eating our fast food. last night, i actually cooked after a ride .. and it was nice, but it didn’t change the scenario much ..

but, before i knew it, it was 11:00 and i was falling asleep on the couch. and so, it was time to go to bed — not a single stitch knitted. not a single style sheet edited. my sweaty bike clothes are in a ball on the dining room floor — because, you know, i have to get up super early the next day to get to work ..

someday, i’ll be able to ride to my favorite trail, whenever i want, right out my front door. that’s the thought that keeps me going.

Feelin' Sassy

Nearly 5 years ago, I was hired to be an IT Support Analyst. I was hired based on my experience with cisco networking and understanding of network concepts. It was agreed that I’d grow into a network support role and ended up following my job description around from week to week as it changed based on the vision of the IT director.

Even after being promoted to Network Administrator in 2003, I never felt like I had the credibility of a network professional and was never given the opportunity to design/maintain/implement network services based on industry standards and best practices. Often, I felt like my opinion or knowledge was not accepted until it was validated by a consultant or other members of the IT organization.

I’ve been accused of not being a team player, of being unprofessional and proprietary, my dedication to the job has been questioned, and my technical abilities have been ignored. I have lived and breathed this organization for almost 5 years, and I’ve rarely gotten a “thank you” or “good job”. I continually received less than satisfactory annual reviews despite my efforts to understand the expectations that were put upon me. In fact, I NEVER had a clear understanding expectations of my daily tasks and feel that my job responsibilities and description have changed more times than I can even realize.

In the end, I realized that my effectiveness was completely used up and therefore, it was time to go. Just over a month shy of my 5 year anniversary, I started a new job and, what feels like, a new life.

I spent my last 2 weeks wondering if I’d made the right decision. I didn’t have to sit in my new desk for 10 minutes before I realized that this job is different than any other I’ve had, and yes, this was a good decision. I was imediately welcomed as a member of the team. I felt supported and needed. I felt respected and involved.

Today is day 2 and I can honestly say that I’ve left the old place behind. I came to work early. I parked in a new parking lot and let myself into a new building with my new ID Access Badge and, being the first to arrive today, I turned on the lights in a new office area. And I had a cheezy grin on my face the whole time. Why would I grin about coming to work early and turning on lights? Because I realized that sometimes the only option there is, is to try something new.

I’d spent so much time — wasted so much time — banging my head against a virtual wall, hoping someone would listen to me, would respect me enough to acknowlege me that I forgot that anything else was possible. This morning, I remembered that there is more to life than that old place and so, I welcomed myself to my new life.

life hippy

Forgive the mess, trying out something new ……

Feelin' Sassy